So, tonight it’s not exactly live in the West! Sorry. I was at a party. A lil’ get together as it were.
But here I am now.
And here we go. 6/12/12 America’s Got Talent in Tampa!
[We here at Nobody’s View have a soft spot for America’s Got Talent. Why? Well, contestants on the show are our kind of folks. Just regular people like you and me who get to live their dream. Getting their moment in the sun. People doing what they feel they were born to do. Hard to argue with that! And, judging by the thousands of you who join me here each season, well, I think you agree! Welcome to the LIVE Nobody’s View America’s Got Talent 2012 blog.]
Ah, yes. It started with “Go Big or Go Home.”
Forget that noise. I hate slogans like that. I have respect for talent that doesn’t have to be big and loud. Sometimes it’s just Sally Cohn handwhistling.
Anyway someone tell Howie that germs can live on fists. I know, right?
So, the Untouchables. The Miami All Stars guy and his wife started this kids’ dancing group. Kids ages 8-13. That’s pretty cool. The All Stars were great last year, so who knows? They were great. Probably better than most of the adult groups on the show. Stern called them “captivating.” Just like their older counterparts last season. So, from Miami to Vegas, just like that.
The Scott Brothers came up next with their…act. Interesting dance duo. Very original. I wonder what they’ll do next? In sync dancing.
Charlie C (did I spell that right, Charlie?) sang. Romantic. Nice voice. Heading to Vegas.
Taylor Reed, magician, performed an illusion. A great illusion. Somehow he made a motorcycle appear in a box. No idea what just happened there. He was great.
Now, if only I could hire Taylor Reed to make a new Mac appear in my life. I actually went into the store today to look at the new ones and they said they had none. None to sell and, none to…get this…SHOW! That’s right! A flagship store that let all their new Macs walk out the door this morning without keeping some for display.
Anyway, off to commercial…
Back from break and shots of women complimenting each other’s hair. Shots of people practicing. Then, Puppets on Hand with a…puppet act. Technical puppets, mind you. There were worm puppets. There were kazoos. Then, there were Xs. Then there were boos. Then there was Howie Mandel with a standing ovation. Then there was Stern encouraging Puppets on Hand to cut the act off.
Then Rangers in Reality. Really. They gave it their best shot.
A paper-teaing guy was up next. What a fascinating thing. It was actually quite interesting. Also, a good way to recycle.
An air sex guy arrived on the stage. It didn’t go over so well.
Then a creepy circus/dance/stilts thing arrived and weirded us all out.
I’m going to head off now and hope I don’t dream about that tonight.
After the break? Cannon on a ship with guns, pirates, and…cannons. Very punny, NBC.
And then? Well, then pirates arrived on the stage. Captain Dan & the Scurvy Crew. A rap group dressed like pirates. I have to say, they are now my favorite rap group. They were in a tight competition with…well…no one actually. Time to walk the plank, guys.
Next? A montage of animals. A squirrel. Twiggy the Squirrel. Twiggy the water skiing squirrel. Twiggy the peeing-on-Nick-Cannon water skiing squirrel.
Oh, but wait. First some of that Orville Redenbacher auditions that popped stuff, THEN Twiggy the peeing-on-Nick-Cannon water skiing squirrel.
That was a lot of squirrel typing.
Hey, is there an act for that? You know what they say: 100 squirrels in front of 100 typewriters for 100 years, and…wait…that’s not what they say.
Anyhoo, outside with Twiggy. And, sure enough, he waterskis. The question now, is, how does he top that act? Does he actually drive the boat? Jump the wake? It was a “yes” from Howie, but not the other two, so time to hit the road. No nuts for you!
American BMX Stunt Team? Another bike act. Interesting how one person does something on the show, and before you know it, well… Look what you started Gramdma Smage! They were actually pretty good. Ten guys crammed on one small stage. Maybe the stage in Vegas will be a bit bigger. Or, does that ruin the thrill?
I’ll stick with a wide road, thanks.
Sharon and Ozzy showed up. Dance teams, rifle teams.
Then, an acrobatic dancer who started at age 2. Lindsey Norton says she lives to entertain. Part acrobat. Part dancer. Part contortionist. Pretty cool. Her parents were just as thrilled as she was. Although, she almost came out of her skin while talking to Howie, she was so excited. Then, Stern summed it up–he said that she’s what America’s about. She has a passion and works hard, even at 16. I’d have to agree with that. Look, folks. You may never get on AGT or get famous, but who the hell cares? Do the thing you love, no matter what. Even if it’s just a hobby.
What do you have to lose? What do you have to gain?
Matthew Perry? He’s back on a show? Ok.
Now, on to a montage of older folks playing lawn bowling and tanning. Ok.
A dance group ranging from 53-71 came on and got buzzed off. Yes. Even in Tampa. Missed their name. What can I say?
Then a Tarzan duo doing…I don’t know what.
Richard Dancing Man then danced himself into what appeared to be vertigo. Followed by Nick who came on stage and joined the Dancing Man to become a dancing duo. But not in Vegas.
Big Barry, a “70-year-old teenager.” He’s 4’10”. He loves to entertain. The audience? Well, they weren’t so on board with it. He sort of had a Bob Dylan vibe going on, right? Well, if it was good enough for Dylan, then why not Big Barry? When Howard Stern stood next to Big Barry, well, it put the whole thing in perspective. It was two “yeses” and two “no.” So y’know? Howard made a Vegas dream come true. There’s nothing wrong with that. Love it.
I wonder if I could convince Stern to let me be a guest host for one night?
Join us next week for more America’s Got Talent. And join us all week for opinion!